Ashes and Wine
by NevermoreLenore13
Summary: Sirius Black never thought much about life and death, until someone's life was literally hanging in his hands. Now, he has to save the life of a girl he can't stop thinking about, even if she doesn't want to be saved.
1. Falling

AN- I feel like I should give a sort of disclaimer for this story. It is M for a reason. With themes of angst, sex, suicide, and other very mature aspects. With that, thanks for picking this story! I appreciate it!

Disclaimer: I own nothing in the world of Harry Potter. I wish I did...I just do not.

Chapter 1: Falling.

The toe of a leather black boot kicked out with a little jerk, sending a rain of chipped brick off the Astronomy Tower. They made no sound as they bounced off the roof spires, disappearing into the darkness surrounding the castle of Hogwarts.

For the past hour, she had stood on the ledge of the tower, staring down at the rooftops wondering how it would feel if-when-she finally stepped off.

From the wooden beams high above her, an owl hooted and fluffed his wings, annoyed at her presence in his home. She glanced back at him and sighed, wishing they could trade lives. It would be a blessing to have your biggest annoyance to be if someone was standing too close.

She would give everything to have those problems.

Gripping the stone beside her, she inched forward until the tips of her boots were hanging over the edge. It would be only one more step and it would be over. Over forever.

Her heart wrenched suddenly, making her stumble back and take a deep gasping breath. She had never been that close before. It scared her, sending her emotions into a flurry inside her head. Taking a deep, shaking breath, she pressed her back against the cool of the stone and rubbed her hands over her face.

She knew it was too late now. She had, once again, been too scared. But tomorrow night. With a sigh, she glanced back at the dark sky stretching out beyond the window. Tomorrow night, she would finally fall.

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><p>"C'mon Sirius!" James yelled, holding the portrait open as his best mate stumbled across the common room. Sirius yawned as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes, his uniform thrown on haphazardly. His shirt was mis-buttoned and hanging over his wrinkled pants.<p>

"Bloody hell, it's early."

"Actually, we're late. Or we will be if you don't get your arse moving!" James kicked his mate in the bum as he passed, gaining a yelp out of Sirius as he grabbed his wounded backside. On the way to Advanced Runes, Sirius polished his just out of bed look and ran a hand through his tousled hair.

By the time they sat in their desks, he was still looking rather shabby, but now it wouldn't gain any attention from the professors. "So, Remus goes all Moony this weekend and I was thinking since we'll be out of the castle anyway…"He trailed off, but Sirius knew exactly where James' mind was going.

With a roll of his eyes, Sirius cracked open his notebook and sighed. "You leave me with Mr. Wolfbane and Wormtail, while you spend the weekend snogging Lily in the room of requirement?"

James looked offended, but replaced his hurt with a devilish grin almost immediately. "What can I say, Padfoot. That bird's got it bad for me."

"Right. Which is why she was practically cursing you into oblivion not even three months ago." James scoffed and waved the boy off as Professor Babbling strolled into the room and flipped the massive chalkboard down, revealing rune after rune to copy. He groaned and dipped his quill in the ink just as the rest of the class followed suit.

All was quiet except for the scratching of quill on parchment until Sirius sighed and turned to James. "Fine. But, you owe me one big time. You know Wormtail's no good when Remus starts moonstrating." James grimaced at his choice of words, always plugging his ears when any subject of a girl's monthly visit was brought up. And the referencing to Remus' change as Moonstrating always sent a tug to James' gag reflex.

"Merlin, Sirius. Do you have to call it that?"

"To see your face like this? Yes!"

"Boys…" Professor Babbling tapped her pointer against the blackboard, stirring up a bit of dust as she narrowed her eyes on the two. Sirius cleared his throat and scribbled messily for a moment more before a tiny sneeze caught his attention.

He looked over his shoulder to the last desk of the row. Sitting alone was a girl he had never noticed before. Her vest held the Ravenclaw emblem, just below the thick mass of hair that splayed across her chest. She sneezed once more as he stared, barely making a squeak.

As she sniffed and looked up to the board to copy the next set of runes, her eyes flickered to Sirius. She looked genuinely shocked to catch him staring. With a rapid set of blinks, she cast her gaze back down and didn't look up for a long moment.

Baffled, Sirius turned back around and shook his head in slight confusion. It wasn't as if didn't know girls were shy, especially around him. But she acted like he had seen her naked. With a shrug, Sirius kept copying runes until Professor Babbling launched into the lecture for the day and his eyelids grew heavy.

With a nudge from James, he managed to keep his eyes open, but his attention was long gone. Which, was not at all shocking behavior from Sirius Black.

As soon as the bell rang, however, he was one of the first out of his seat and heading for the door. "Hey." He nudged James in the ribs, nodding toward the door. "Who is that?" He pointed to the girl who had sneezed and watched her dodge students as she hurried from the door. People walked past her, not even noticing her at all.

"Who?" James asked, fumbling with his wand. He was used to Sirius inquiring about pretty girls. He knew he'd find out sooner or later who the broad was. Sirius sighed and pointed through the crowd, grabbing his mate by the shoulder. "Her!"

"There's nearly fifty people in this hallway, mate. I gotta get to Potions. Save me a seat at lunch, will ya?" He called to Sirius over the heads of a group of giggling third years. They looked at the messy haired boy as he strolled passed, smirking their way only to send them into more hushed and nervous giggles.

"Yeah, yeah." Sirius waved and headed toward his next class, trying to get the girl out of his mind. He couldn't help thinking about the way no one had even noticed her. Hell, he had never noticed her before today but, her wide eyes staring at him in his mind were all he could focus on during the next few classes.

During lunch, the clouds that loomed over the castle finally opened up and rain pounded the rooftop, making the dreary Monday seem to drag by even slower. Sirius yawned and slumped against Remus, slapping the book he had his nose stuck into away.

With a sigh, Remus slipped his bookmark into the page he had been at and turned to Sirius. "You could have just asked me to stop reading."

"Yeah, this was more fun." Sirius glanced over to Peter who had been stuffing his mouth with buttery croissants the entire time. "Easy, Wormy. That stuff goes straight to your hips, you know." Peter giggled behind a mouthful of bread and switched his attention to the pudding.

More students filed into the Great Hall behind them, and Sirius couldn't help sneaking a glance to the Ravenclaw table. No one immediately caught his attention and he shrugged, figuring he would probably never find out about the girl and was determined to forget all about her.

Before he could kick himself for thinking about not thinking about the girl, James plopped down beside him and grinned. Lipstick marks decorated James' blushing face and his three mates stared at him with blank stares. "What?" He asked, flattening down his hair.

"You wearin' make up again, Prongs?"

James glared and wiped his lips before digging into the chicken and potatoes that materialized before him. "Where's my Potions book?" Sirius asked him, looking around his friend. The space was bare and Sirius could feel anger boiling inside. "James!"

"I forgot it…I'm sorry. Lily and I were in the Astronomy Tower, and started snogging a bit..I must've left it up there."

Sirius groaned and smacked his friend on the arm. "Go get it!"

"No way, I'm starving. Besides, it's your book."

"That you forced me to let you borrow!" Growling, Sirius realized James' arse was not leaving the bench, only further proven a fact by him shoving mouthfuls of food into his face. With a muffled curse, Sirius stomped off to the Astronomy Tower to retrieve his bloody text book. It figured James would pull something like this.

His mind was entirely wrapped around Lily Evans. Lily this, Lily that. If they didn't get married, Sirius was going to be incredibly pissed. Especially if he had to put up with a love sick James, only to have his heart broken. Love sick James he could handle…Heart broken James was a scary thought.

Sirius stopped suddenly in his trek up the stairs and watched his mystery girl hurry out of the library. Her head was bowed as she stomped up the stairs.

'Wonder where she's heading…' Sirius thought, following her steps as quietly as he could.

After a moment of stalking, he realized that she was heading in the same direction he had been going. No one had Astronomy until dusk, so what could she possibly be doing? Perhaps she was going to snog her boyfriend in the darkness.

In a blink, she had disappeared up the spiral stair case, taking the steps two at a time. Sirius hurried and raced up the stairs, catching the sight of her boots and skirt as she rounded the corner and stepped into the classroom.

He slowed and watched from the doorway as she stopped behind the telescopes lining the enormous windows. With a flick of her wand, one of the telescopes scraped across the floor and left the window empty and completely open.

Frowning, Sirius stepped into the room and opened his mouth to speak. He clamped his lips shut as the girl put a folded piece of paper on the telescope and took a step toward the window, her arms out stretched.

The rain was soaking her boots as she walked up to the ledge and took a deep breath. "Bloody hell!" Sirius muttered before racing to the window. The scene played out in his terrified mind in slow motion. He could see her lift herself onto her toes and lean forward, a look of pure sadness striking her face. Sirius ran as fast as he could and reached out, grabbing the fabric of her shirt flapping against the girl's ribs.

The sudden jerk caused her to turn and scream as she fell out the window, her hands desperately grabbing for the ledge. Sirius held on as tightly as he could as she dangled by her shirt in his hand, his arm wrapped around the iron sconce hanging between the windows.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

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><p>An- Please, please review!<p> 


	2. Hope for the Hopeless

**Disclaimer**-Once again, I do not own anything from the realm of Harry Potter…unfortunately

Chapter 2: Hope For The Hopeless

Ashlen Clarke knew only one thing for certain; that she would be much happier dead. What she didn't know was that the Astronomy Tower, and any ledge in the entire castle that would send a student to the hospital wing or morgue was charmed to toss them back where they fell from. She realized this fact two seconds after the boy who had grabbed her shirt, had shouted at her.

She looked up, a wave of different emotions roiling inside her chest as she gazed up at the angry face of Sirius Black. Shock, anger, desperation, and the most infuriating sense of relief flooded through Ashlen's body as the charm surrounding the Astronomy Tower kicked in. She felt a small shiver weave its way around her body before she was flung back through the open window, landing with a grunt on top of the very boy who had her dangling moments ago.

With a growl, Ashlen got to her feet and snatched the suicide note she had written several weeks ago from the telescope and stomped toward the stairs, leaving Sirius groaning on the cobble stone.

"What the bloody hell?" He rolled over and stared after her as she disappeared into the stair well. "Wait one bloody minute!" He shouted, racing after her, thoughts of his Potions textbook long forgotten. Sirius reached out and grabbed the girl for the second time, this time around the elbow, and whirled her around. Anger flared in her eyes, and it was his turn to stare at her with surprise.

"What?"

"What? I just saved your bleeding life and you say 'what'?" He shoved a hand through his hair, his fingers still trembling from the ordeal. "What the hell were you thinking? You could have killed yourself!"

The girl in front of him rolled her eyes and blew a strand of hair that had fallen across her face away. She put her hands on her hips and stared at Sirius. "Oh, thank you, so much. I had no idea that jumping from the Astronomy Tower would kill me. Thank you _so much_ for clearing that up." With a final glare, she spun on her heel and stomped down the stairs.

"Yeah, well maybe I should clear it up with Professor Dumbledore." He snapped, smirking to himself when she stopped mid step, her foot hovering over the next step down. She turned and glared up at him.

"Look. It was a mistake." She said softly, slipping the tattered remains of her shirt around her body. "I'm sorry."

He took a few steps down and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning against the cool stone of the wall. "Yeah, well, how do I know you're not going to try it again?"

"Well, obviously it wouldn't work. Magic and all." She waved her hand around as if she were waving an annoying fly away from her face. Despite the sarcasm dripping from her words, she knew he wasn't convinced. Perfect. Just what she needed; someone to think she needed a white knight in shining armor.

Sirius scoffed and dropped his arms. "Yeah, until you've figured out a quick death potion. Or offed yourself in some other crazy way."

"Stay out of my business! I never asked for your help." Ashlen stood her ground, but knew her resolve was fading. All she wanted to do was curl up into her blankets and let the dam of tears that stung her eyelids free. The boy above her stared down quietly, his eyes burning with things she couldn't detect. He looked disappointed, as if he knew she was better than any of it. With a sigh, he let his shoulders slump.

"Look. I have to tell someone. If…If something happened, it would be my fault."

The tears behind her eyes slipped through the dam, and she found it hard to swallow the lump in her suddenly dry throat. She took a step and shook her head. "No. Please. I know I was being stupid just…please don't tell anyone." She swallowed again, damning her voice for shaking.

Sirius sighed heavily. "If I don't see you in class tomorrow, I'm going straight to Dumbledore and we will scour the entire castle looking for you. And don't even think I won't. There will be _no_ where to hide." He narrowed his eyes on her as he passed by her, descending the stairs and leaving Ashlen standing with tears pouring like rain down her face.

For the first time in a long time, her thoughts weren't completely and utterly focused on the thought of death. She stared at the place Sirius stepped before disappearing around the corner, feeling her cheeks stiffen from sobbing before she made her way to her dorm. A night of crying was exactly what she needed to put this horrible day behind her.

The next day, Sirius sat in Ancient Runes ten minutes earlier than anyone else. He had been up and dressed before James could even wake up, which is something unprecedented. His leg bounced anxiously as he stared at the door to the classroom, growing more and more worried with every student that was not his mysterious jumper from the day before.

"Mate. Seriously. You're giving me the willies." James said as he slid into the stool beside him. The other students laughed and readied their notebooks for another hour of avid quill scribbling. But Sirius couldn't hear any of it.

Her seat remained empty.

Just as Professor Babbling waltzed in and erased yesterday's lesson, Sirius felt the urge to flee while her back was turned. He gripped the back of the chair and started to stand before another body slipped into the classroom and ducked into the back desk. Sirius felt himself visibly relax and exhaled the breath he wasn't aware he had been holding in. From beside him, James cleared his throat, a clear indication that he was seriously confused by Sirius' behavior. Before he could say anything, Sirius took the opportunity of the Professor's back still turned and hurried to the back desk.

He slipped his notebook out and cracked it open, despite the stares he was receiving from both James and the girl beside him. The chalk in Professor Babbling's hands moved furiously over the black board, drawing out intricate lines and curves of a new set of runes, and Sirius knew she would be busy for at least the next few minutes.

"I didn't get your name yesterday."

The girl continued to stare at him before pursing her lips and dipping her shabby looking quill in the ink jar that sat between them. "Ash. What are you doing back here?"

"Checking on you, of course." He looked up at the chalkboard and tried to replicate the runes as best as he could. His designs looked more like bored scribbling than actual things.

Ash sniffed and glared at him, her parchment stained with the ink that dripped off her quill. "Well, stop it. I don't need someone to baby sit me."

"Apparently you do!" The chalk stopped mid curl of a rune and Professor Babbling waiting for a moment before continuing. Blushing, Ash started copying the notes and glared out of the corner of her eye at the boy beside her. "Look, if you hadn't been there last night, nothing would have happened. I would have bounced right back in, and you would be none the wiser. Can we not pretend none of it happened?"

Sirius paused and dwelled on what she said for a moment before shaking his head. "No. Because I do know, and I can't just forget about it ok?"

Growling low, Ash scribbled furiously on the parchment, not paying the least bit attention to what she was writing down. "I'll pay you."

"Got lots of money, already."

"I'll do your homework for the rest of the year."

Sirius smirked with a small shrug of his shoulders. "Peter's got that covered. He lost a bet." He explained, as if Ash had any inkling as to who he was even referring to. Biting her lip she knew she had to get this crazy, irritating boy out of her hair. Not so she could find somewhere quiet to kill herself. She knew she had acted stupidly, and it took last night's incident and crying for five and a half hours for her to realize it.

But if Sirius Black was planning on stalking her until graduation just because he was afraid she'd throw herself off the swinging stairs, she was going to go crazy. Her life had enough problems; she didn't need him to add anymore.

"Then what? What can I do to get you to leave me alone?"

He lifted his head and looked upward, contemplating her question as he tapped the quill to his chin. "To convince me to leave you alone, and just forget anything happened? Nothing. You can, however-"

"Alright class. Today we are going to do things a little differently." Professor Babbling began passing out sheets of paper down the rows of desks. "I've asked the Headmaster for permission to do a little group project." She looked at the class as a collective groan rolled through the students. "It's a Runic Scavenger Hunt. I have hidden 100 runes throughout the grounds of the castle. Some are inside, some are out. If you are lucky enough to find all 100, you will get a special prize, and a passing grade. If you find more than 50, you will get no prize, but a passing grade. However, if you do nothing at all and find less than 50 before the deadline, we will have some problems."

Ash looked at the paper that was passed to her and sighed. The roll of parchment was ridiculously long, and had so many runes that she had never even seen. There was a space beside each to tell what it was, and give a description about it. Professor Babbling clapped her hands and grinned. "Now you will have partners but you must each turn in an assignment. However, you will not be free to choose. Those of you sitting next to someone, they're not your partners. Mr. Potter, you can pair up with Mr. Leventhal."

Sirius snickered into his hand as James whirled around and glared daggers at him. It would be payback for James 'forgetting' his text book in the Astronomy Tower. Les Leventhal was one of the smelliest kids in the entire school of Hogwarts, and James was going to complain for the next two weeks about it. It was a small price to pay for Sirius' enjoyment.

Sirius turned to Ash who was glaring icily into him. "Wha?"

"Now I'm stuck with you no matter what. Perfect."

With a grin, Sirius slipped his notebook shut and leaned back against his chair. "Perfect! We can start tonight after dinner! I'll meet you in the Great Hall." With that, he closed his eyes with a small smile still spread across his lips. Ash wished she could have poured their ink on his face.

The Great Hall was alive with hundreds of floating candles, buffets of endless amounts of food, and deafening roar of student's talking. Ash sat at the end of the Ravenclaw table, like she always did, pushing her food around her plate. A couple of peas rolled off the gold plate onto the table to be ignored. Since the first class of the day, Ash had been trying to think of an excuse – ANY excuse – to get out of being Sirius Black's partner.

Professor Babbling wouldn't listen to her and had told her that she was a bit too old to be complaining about trivial things like this before slamming the door in Ash's face. There was nothing more she could do, except complain about it to herself all day.

She stabbed a piece of chicken, imagining it to be Sirius' face just as someone slid in to the bench next to her. A plate of food appeared and Sirius' face lit with excitement. He rubbed his hands together before digging a fork into his food. After several long minutes, he looked over to Ash, unaware of the crumbs lining his bottom lip and sticking into the whiskers of his 5 o'clock shadow. "Wham? Do I haff sommin on muh fash?" He wiped off the corner of his mouth, completely missing the food plastered to his chin.

Rolling her eyes, Ash pushed her plate away and ignored it as it disappeared into Merlin knew where. "What are you doing over here? You said to meet after dinner." She spoke slowly, through clenched teeth as she glanced around at the group of girls sitting a few spaces up from them. They had been whispering since the moment Sirius sat down and kept glancing at Ash and looking down their noses at her as if she had done something to offend them.

With a shrug, Sirius bit into a fluffy roll and nodded back towards the Gryffindor table. "James is completely enthralled with Lily, Remus is completely enthralled in his book, and Peter is enthralled in the food. So, I figured I'd pay a visit to my new best friend."

"I am _not_ your new friend. We had an unfortunate meeting, and we just happen to be working on an assignment together." She pressed her finger into his shoulder harshly, making him wince. He rubbed the sore spot and dropped his roll on his plate, his eyes narrowing on her.

"Look. You're not getting rid of me. I'm not forgetting what happened. You're going to work on this assignment with me and I will be checking up on you. If you don't like that, then I can go straight to a Professor and turn you over to them. Your choice." He nodded with finality, but his tone made Ash seethe with anger.

How dare he think he could just control her life? How dare he think that she was just some suicidal maniac waiting for the chance to try again? He had no idea what she had been through, what she's going through, and no matter how much he forced himself in her company, he never would. "Fine! But if you so much as get in my way once, I'll go to the damn Headmaster myself!" She slammed her books on the table and stood up, making the girls who were still whispering hush immediately and look over at her with wide eyes. "Oh, go to hell!" Ash snapped at them, knowing they would have rumors spread by dawn about how she threatened them with a steak knife.

Outside the doors to the Great Hall Ash realized she was still supposed to be working on their Runes project. With an aggravated sigh, she leaned against the stone wall and waiting for Sirius to finish eating, or flirting, or whatever the hell he was doing. Never in her miserable life did she imagine things would turn out this way.

She let her head fall back against the wall and her eyes close as she tried to sort her thoughts. It wasn't as if she had a terrible life. Her parents were rich, but incredibly set in their 17th century ways, thinking a witch her age should be looking for a suitable husband instead of concentrating on school work. The drawers of her night stand were filled with letters from her mother asking the same things: 'Have you found a suitable match for you?', 'Have you been reading the papers for eligible husbands?'( as if they had such a section), or her absolute favorite, 'Ashlen, dear, you need a husband to fulfill you duties as a woman'.

The letters had stopped recently though. In a way, she was thankful she didn't have to hate the sight of her owl pecking at her window late at night, but she would trade incessant letters for her current situations. It was completely unbearable to think about, and Ash's eyes stung with the threat of tears. She felt a drop slip from her eyelid and roll down her cheek annoyingly.

"Here you are…Are you okay?" The voice made her start and she quickly wiped her face, trying not to look at Sirius.

"Just dandy. Let's get this over with." She pushed off the wall and together, they went to search for the runes. For each one assigned were clues that led you in the right direction. Ash looked down at her paper, damning the blur from the tears that pooled in her eyes. "What has a face but cannot see, cannot smell, cannot taste." She rolled her eyes and led their way to the clock that hung over the entire foyer of the castle.

Sirius stood behind, tapping his chin in deep concentration. "What has a face….a face…Well, we all have faces. I'm stumped." He dropped his arms to his side as Ash pointed up at the clock with an eyebrow raised. "Oh," Sirius said, smirking sheepishly. "I knew that."

They both marked the rune down and moved on to the next one. After half an hour, Sirius was yawning and slacking off. He hadn't copied down the last two and was currently sitting in the library, his feet propped up on the table. Ash ignored him as she wrote down the 15th rune before sitting back in her own seat. "Are you even trying anymore?"

He made a sound as he yawned and shrugged. "Let's do something else now."

"Something else…No. We're only in each other's company for one reason. And that's not to have fun." She didn't look up from her parchment, but could feel Sirius staring at her. Her cheeks flushed and her stomach twisted in a nervous knot. "What?" She asked, looking up as she pushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Nothing." Sirius sat up, letting his feet fall to the floor with a thump. "I'm just thinking." After Ash didn't respond, Sirius leaned forward and propped his chin in his hand. "Do you even know how to have fun?"

Scoffing, Ash rolled her eyes and folded her arms over her chest. "What kind of question is that? Of course I do."

"Really? Because from the very brief moments I've spent with you, you haven't been very friendly. And it doesn't look as if you have any friends…So, what do you do for fun?"

Ash swallowed slowly and took a deep breath. So what if she didn't have friends? That gave her less things to leave behind. With a sigh, she shook her head and gathered her things. "Not everyone has to be a jack ass to have fun."

"You're avoiding the question."

"I'm trying to avoid you."

"Still avoiding the question." Sirius said in a sing-song tone, examining his fingernails as Ash steamed in her seat at his persistence.

"Fine. Whatever. No. I don't have much fun. Are you happy now?"

"Happy? Of course not! I feel a very important, very personal mission coming on." He nodded as he tapped his lips in deep thought. "Yes, I do believe we have happened upon each other for this reason. I'm going to show you how to have fun!" He grabbed her hand and jerked her up, gathering their books quickly. Ash was shaking her heat, the knot in her stomach growing by the second.

"No, really. You don't have to."

"Sure I do! Meet me in the courtyard tomorrow before Hogsmeade. We'll have fun." He winked at her, sending another wave of heat to her cheeks before strolling out of the library as if he had just won an esteemed award. Ash was left, staring after him for the second day in a row. This time, however she couldn't help the foreign feel of a smile starting to prick at the corner of her lips. She quickly wiped it away and stalked off to the common room.

Tomorrow was going to be interesting, indeed.

**An- Thanks so much for my reviews! PrincessDripDrop, ixamxeverywhere, and WickedFaith! You guys rock!**


	3. Tower

Disclaimer- I don't own anything! I promise!

An- Thanks for all the reviews! I really appreciate them!

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Chapter 3: Tower

"Alright. Spill." James guided Sirius by the shoulders through the dormitory the four boys shared until his rump contacted with the bed. Sirius fell back on his elbows and stared in confusion at the three mates surrounding him. Peter bit his thumbnail, looking nervously from James, to Remus, and finally to Sirius.

"Yeah." He said, laughing nervously. "You didn't even make me carry your books to class today. Remember how I lost that bet with you and James?" Sirius rolled his eyes at the boy and poked his bulging stomach.

"You always lose, Wormtail. And there's nothing to spill."

James pursed his lips and held up Sirius' Potions text book that he had completely forgotten about until it was hung before his eyes. With a sheepish shrug, Sirius took the book. "Must've got side tracked on my way to get it."

"Speaking of side tracked, what the bloody hell was that all about in Runes today? I have to be paired with the Smelly Les because of you."

"Look, if I told you, especially you, Remus, you'd all make a big deal about it and that's exactly what I'm trying to avoid right now. Let's just say, I've been called on by a higher power." The three boys stared at Sirius as if he were speaking ten languages at once. But, it was true. Sirius Black was on a mission. He felt, deep down that his Potions book was left in the library on purpose and he was meant to save Ash. Sure, she would have just bounced right back in, but she would be all alone. And the last thing someone needs after trying to commit suicide, is to be alone.

He leaned back on his bed, his arms crossed behind his head and stared up at the charmed miniature dragons flying around the canopy. They crisscrossed over each other, and their movements always helped Sirius fall asleep.

With a sigh, James waved him mate off and stalked to his side of the room, pulling out the latest Quidditch Monthly to read up on the scores. He and Peter discussed the upcoming season, leaving Remus to sit next to the laying boy. "You know you can tell me anything, Sirius."

"I know. And I will." He sighed and turned his eyes back to the tiny dragons quarreling above his head. "But, I don't want to jinx it."

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><p>"So, what was all that business at dinner tonight?"<p>

"Are you actually trying to hook up with Sirius Black?"

"He would never go for you."

"He's out of your league."

"Miles out, actually."

Ash stared at the girls she had barked at hours before with her mouth agape, trying to respond but cut off each time by another girl. It was like a hydra, with more and more heads popping up out of nowhere. Taken aback, Ash wanted to just run away and lock herself in the lavatory…but knew she would be laughed at until graduation.

The girls nodded in agreement at that last fact a blonde had stated, her hair neatly pinned back in the tidiest bun Ash had ever seen. She was suddenly aware of her unwashed mass of dark curls. "We're on an assignment together…for Ancient Runes?" The girls crossed their arms over their chest in unison, as if each shared the same thought of 'yeah right'.

Ash figured if she didn't flee now, they would rope her back in with more interrogating. She slid past them, ignoring the glares as she walked hurriedly down the corridor to the girl's dormitory. The doors on each side of the hallway were flung open with sounds of rock music, laughter, and excited chatter filtered out. Ash passed them quickly, rushing to the door of the dorm she shared with a very shy girl named Emily. At least there was that to be thankful for.

Emily kept to herself, drawing in her sketch book, or writing things down in a leather bound journal. She and Ash hardly ever spoke, except to trade notes for a study session, or if they accidentally bumped one another. Emily was nowhere to be seen as Ash shut the door behind her.

With a relieved sigh, she slid into her bed, pulling the navy covers over her legs. She shut the matching drapes around her bed and laid her head down, squeezing her eyes shut. What had they meant by he would never go for her? It's obvious he wanted to spend time with her. He was taking her out tomorrow for Hogsmeade Saturday. That had to mean something right?

"Yeah, only out of pity." She mumbled to herself, smashing her fists into the pillow to both relieve some pent up hostility and fluff the stuffing. She rolled over and stared at the dark canopy, trying to sort out the whirlwind in her mind.

Her arms itched and she ached to run to the Astronomy Tower, but for the first time, the little voice that told her to jump was oddly quiet. With a sigh, she closed her eyes and counted to ten, over and over, until at long last she was drifting off.

* * *

><p>.~.~.~.~.~.<p>

"Ashlen Moira Clarke, come here at once." Her mother's voice snapped, and an instant sense of dread poured through Ash. She walked into the parlor where her mother and step father sat, their back's straight as arrows. The light filtering through the mauve curtains caught every speck of dust floating between them.

Before she could speak, a third presence drew her attention to the large, grey leather chair toward the back of the room. A man stood and pulled his cloak away from his shoulders, making him seem four feet wide. He was tall, so much that Ashlen had to look up from across the room.

"This is Voss Strom, your father's new business partner." Ashlen looked to the man who would never be her father and narrowed her eyes. His 'business' was as shady as the Black Forest, and the less she knew about it, the better. Men came and went at all hours of the night, sneering, leering, hollow shells of their former selves.

Still, she knew the punishment that would come if she did not respond. With a small bend of her knees, she bowed her head. "Pleased to meet you."

In two strides he had closed the gap between them and lifted her hand to his lips. Her fingers felt unbelievably small compared to his. She wanted to rip them from his grasp and wash them immediately. "The pleasure," He spoke, his voice the sound of crunching gravel, "is all mine."

Suddenly, the urge to gag threatened her throat and Ash made a quick excuse to leave the room. She glanced back only once. Mr. Strom was standing, watching her escape, a smile spread across his mouth that sent shivers across her neck. Even after she was safe behind closed doors, the look in his eyes haunted her…

~.~.~.~.~.~.

* * *

><p>Gasping, Ash sat up in bed, her fingers clutching the sheets between white knuckles. The dream faded into black, leaving her breathing heavy and heart pounding against her skin.<p>

Ash put a hand to her damp forehead and took slow breaths, trying to calm herself down. From outside the drapes surrounding her bed, the sun was barely peeking over the horizon. A gray light filtered in, barely lighting the room.

She put her feet on the floor and walked to the window that over looked the cliff side. Clouds were thick in the sky, threatening rain for the entire day. Ash hugged her arms around her waist and debated slipping back into the warm sheets faintly calling to her. And then, the rush of memory from the previous night filled her head. She was going to spend the day with a boy who apparently was miles out of her league.

No, there would be no way for her to be able to relax in bed when she had to worry about the day's coming events. Boys in general was foreign territory for her, let alone a boy who could literally pick and choose whomever he wanted to date.

"Not dating." She reminded herself, rolling her eyes at her own girlish stupidity. Until those girls put the silly notion in her brain, she had only been annoyed by Sirius' attention. But what if he really did like her? The thought alone made her stomach twist into thousands of knots. She needed to clear her head, and fast. Slipping a pair of jeans that lay beside her bed on, Ash pulled a hooded sweatshirt over her head and slipped quietly out into the corridor.

She made it to the Astronomy Tower a few minutes later, sticking to the shadows just in case someone of authority had decided to take a midnight stroll. Ash hadn't been alone in the Astronomy Tower since the incident with Sirius and to see it alone, in the early dawn light sent a slight chill up her spine.

She crept to the telescopes and sat between her usual spot, resting her shoulder against the stone pillar beside her. Her toes hung clenched over the edge of the window and the cold stone against her skin was a welcome feeling. With a sigh, Ash closed her eyes and let the wind whirl around her. It was so nice not to have to _think_ about anything.

She hugged her knees to her chest and felt a bit of peace unlike the chaos that her last few days have been. Still, despite the serenity that surrounded her in the Astronomy Tower, she couldn't help the nervous gnaw in the pit of her stomach as the minutes ticked by.

It was only after an hour sitting up in the Tower that Ash made her way back to the common room to get ready for her day. The anxiety she felt earlier was still there, but she had come to terms with it. She knew that she would be seen meeting Sirius, and she knew he would be oblivious to the taunts she would get later.

Still, ditching Sirius would prove to be far worse. She didn't need Dumbledore contacting her already insane parents and telling them what she had planned. They would pluck her out of Hogwarts like she was an unwanted chin hair on her mother's face.

She charmed her hair dry as she wrapped a fluffy, gray towel around her body. The Ravenclaw emblem was tucked under her armpit, scratching at her skin. Inside her shared room, Emily was up and pacing the floor on her side of the room. A huge peacock quill was in her hand as she mumbled incoherently, tapping her chin in deep thought.

Ash sneaked into the room and slipped her favorite long sleeved shirt over her head and pulled on the hem to make it longer. "Going somewhere?" Emily asked loud enough to make Ash start, but still not looking at her. Biting her lip, Ash took her time buttoning her jeans and sat on the edge of her bed. "I…" They had never really talked about boys, or anything besides passing comments, but she needed another female opinion. "I'm meeting Sirius Black. He's…taking me to Hogsmeade."

Emily stood up and looked at her from over her shoulder, her elegant eyebrow arched. "Oh la-la." With a smirk, she scribbled furiously in her leather bound notebook.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Ash tied her shoes and rushed off to the courtyard to wait on Sirius. Couples passed, hand in hand, giggling happily. Ash looked away and crossed her arms over her chest, wishing she had worn a small jacket. It wasn't too cold, but the wind was getting to her.

After a few moments, with only her thoughts to accompany her, Ash was starting to wonder if she was daft, if Sirius was just playing some horrible mean prank on her. She pursed her lips, cursing herself for falling for something so idiotic and so stupid! How could she—

"All set?" The voice beside her startled her, making her spin around. Sirius stood with his hands in his pockets, grinning rather mischievously. A couple of girls stared at them from across the courtyard, and Ash couldn't help but notice their giggles and the whispers they were not too concerned with keeping quiet. Ash lifted her chin and smiled softly at Sirius. "Sure."

He made no attempt to move, except to cross his arms over his chest as he looked at her rather curiously. Ash pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and looked around. "What?"

"Nothing, that's just the first time I've seen you smile. Even if it was tiny." He smirked and held out his hand for her to walk by. "After you."

Blushing, Ash started off towards the bridge, with her companion right beside her. They walked in silence until they set off to Hogsmeade. The sign beside the road displayed the town's name in scrawling gold letters, and Ash followed its arrow obediently. Until Sirius tugged her elbow and pulled her off the trail. "Wait, what are you doing?" She pointed helplessly to the sign as Sirius held on and made his way toward the woods.

"You didn't really want to spend your Saturday at Hogsmeade did you?"

"Well…I don't know. You said yesterday-"

"I said, meet me before Hogsmeade. Never said anything about actually going." They stepped into the trees and now Ash could no longer see the trail she had stepped off of. The castle was barely visible through the trees and before long, all there was to see were the trees.

"So where are we going?"

Sirius turned and grinned, holding up his long, elegantly carved wand. He tapped it twice on a tree limb and mumbled a word so low Ash couldn't make it out. Before she could ask him anything else, the trees slid aside, the branched braiding themselves together over their heads. Ash stared in awe as she watched the trees glide over the forest floor, their roots pushing together until inside the alcove, she could see what it was.

People were gathered around a small campfire, silver mugs in their hands with steaming liquids. She recognized a few Gryffindor's, Sirius' friends, but there were other students there that Ash had never spoken two words to. She opened her mouth, but Sirius cut her off. "We, my new friend, are going camping."

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AN- Thanks SOO much for all the reviews! It really encourages me to write! This chapter was a bit of filler, but the next one will have lots of Sirius in it! I promise!


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